Metropolitan Remand Centre

It's the worst place to visit. The staff think they are cops and the vending machines never work. The blower sensors never work also. You get more respect at Port Phillip prison and that isn't saying much.

Reasonable sized ‘suites’ with colour TV, paint scheme needs updating from previous tenants choice of a dull ‘BRONZE’ tint. Take your own ‘Ox’ cos the teabaccy local to Ravenhall is very ave. Nice early morning mix of ‘transfer station’ & ‘tannery’ breezes which work better than smelling salts. Too much security & checking ID’s, must be due to terrorism threats, but you’ll definitely feel you’re always an imposition to some of the staff but overall you’ll know you’re important cos they always want to hold your baggy, local, green, native dress leisure pants up for you from a discreet spot at the back while also constantly checking with a metal detector, if a bomb or gun has been planted on you by those terrorists they’re concerned about again. The pinnacle of single & twin share accommodation in the premier tourist mecca of Ravenhall. No bookings req cos they’ll always make room for you. I must’ve caught an infectious disease cos I was ‘offered’ totally selfish but free from all other ‘visitors’ in my own isolated hotel wing, & made sure my relatives & friends didn’t catch it by checking for loose bowel movements by coughing, as the staff say, for some guy called ‘the guvnor’. Very thoughtful eh. 9/10

My husband is temporarily a guest here, and as far as I can tell, the place is as good as it could be, insofar as things like jails and remand centres CAN be ‘good’. They certainly do seem to be looking after him well enough.on my way to my first contact visit with him x

Had an absolute ball! Great food, great service and I will defiantly be going there again! Had so much fun in 2015 when everyone decided to riot. We smashed computers, used tractors to push down fences and the best part was being shot at with tear gas at the end. Would recommend 10 out of 10.

I live in Hastings and called up on Friday to see if i was booked in to see my father and they tell you that they can not disclose that information.they really need to be shut down these guys.the amount of times the prisoners have there lawyers complaining and nothings gets done makes me sick.

Horrible remand centre.
They treat visitors as if they are criminals.
There machines are faulty and the guards treat you like absoulte crap. I won't go see my partner anymore until he is moved.